1. |
emma gonzales (& acab)
02:11
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every mom in the burbs has a gun now
cops are being sent to burn out our nests
every1 living has mass death trauma now
except the blood drinking white supremacists
CH:
im mentally ill / im mentally ill
im mentally ill / forgot to take my crazy pills
im mentally ill / im mentally ill
im mentally ill / but i do not kill
alot of us live too postapocalyptic already
mass shootings everyday
fentanyl to keep us steady
gotta force my limbs up out the muck for this
gotta force myself to give a fuck for this
(CH)
dont let them take yr grief from you
turn it to rage
dont let them take yr loss from you
turn it to change
im mentally ill....
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2. |
gunkhead
02:56
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used to be on GABAs
xanny poppin tingler
whisperin everything &
slang in ASMR
now that ima gunkhead
clot my aqueducts up
heart's gonna stop
when i zen it down enuh-uff
pass me tha gunk pump
so i can boink up
i sure hope there aint
elephant tranq in the cuh-ut
im sunken in an anna kavan cave
n i cant look up
i think this gunks real fenty
n i dont mean the makeup
---
when i goo i do it like this ya
when i gunk i pump it like this uh
when i boink i filter out the doink ya
when i slime i have a good time ya
gotta lotta nerve
what master do u serve?
who u tryna slurp?
think i hit a nerve
when i goo i do it like this ya
when i dab i gotta take a nap ya
when i mush i make my brain slush ya
when i krate i know i got another day left
when i lean i take it in the spleen ya
when i nod i musta took a wad ya
when i swill i follow it with pills yeah
when i boink i filter out the doink ya
am i too high?
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3. |
||||
Fuck me drug me the world is really ugly
Cinched in unzipped nothing comes for free
Pay up pay up or die
Pay up or die
Pay up or die
Pay up or ill leave
Asshole perv shitty skeez
Im dressed in red lame so you better pay
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4. |
retirement plan
02:00
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no future together
but not a surprise
we never expected
a future to our lives
I've gazed downward fathoms
hurled eyes down th'abyss
licked sides of the void
swallowing murky piss
sink into the ink
sink into the ee-ink
nothing...bestirs me
nothing...envelops me
nothing...comforts me
nothing...feels ggood to me
sink into the ink
the illusion was a lie
we're not meant to survive
born at the wrong time
resources til we die
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5. |
dumpster-trag
01:50
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fillthee fuhking christyuns
im back cleanin their trash
in Cali its not an isshuh
but heer i gotta deal w/ that
they dont think gays are ppl
clutch kids if sum1's black
& to them i do not exist
cuz ima dumpster-trag
it makes me wanna scrap
it makes me mad as frag
& nunovum have fashun
khaki cargos / baseball caps
filthee fugging chrustyens
im back cleanin their traaash
& to them i do not exist cuz
ima dumpster traaaaggg
why dont i like camo?
do u even hafta ask
ded deers and fish gut twonderr
swipe left swipe left swipe left
cuz ima dumpster traaaaggg
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6. |
||||
7. |
||||
smokin crack until the bus
yr world was never meant 4 us
maggot magnets broke limbs trussed
i'll lie that u can buy my trust
if u believe u have a future
yule never understand
mine sinks just like water into sand
it was gored out w/ the rest of my guts
the world was never meant 4 us
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8. |
||||
watch a needle break off in your best friends arm
they tell u that its normal and you shouldnt be alarmed
wont think twice about it until it happens to you
it doesnt matter because theres nothin better to do
spinning in a web,
tumbling to the ground,
no matter what you do,
it all comes back around
if everythings a circle why does
everybody die?
if everyones my friend then why does
everybody die?
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9. |
||||
(CH):
Mirror Mirror on the ground
Who's the saddest of them all?
Shattered pieces, kiss the floor
Tell me who, tell me more
(V 1)
See, never thought nothing mattered but being true
True to you, true to me
Humble pie, it tastes so sweet
(CH)
(V2)
We're walking around on tender feet
Scorched cement, insufferable heat
Choking on your lies and deciet
(CH)
(V 3)
You think we're gunna let you walk away with our souls
Bury us down, we'll crawl back up for me
Show me, Show me, Show me where
Kick them down those big long stairs
(CH)
(BRIDGE)
Swinging blindly in to the nothingness
Keep coming back with swollen fists
Holes inside my chest grow larger
Holes in my stockings rip
Holes in the ground devour
What we never imagined would exist
Dig in to the cold, wet dirt
Dig in to your pain and hurt
(CH)
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10. |
cold cop blues
02:15
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inna cutty gas station
just lookin at their shoes
cant cope cant cop
i got the cold cop blues
this small towns walls are closin in
n i got no mind to lose
so im diggin thru fast food
trash for used balloons
its 10 duhgrees outside
n its sleet n rainin too
im checkin every corner
n u know im turnin blue
theres plenty crack but
thats not the one i wanna do
cant cope cant cop
i got the cold cop blues
CH:
cant cope cant cop
i got a runny nose too
cant cope cnt cop
i ot the cold cop blues
look nat ppls arms
drive by bus stops
switchin diffrent code talks
whadda fuck is up
im lookin for my boy
u kno i feed um dog food
lookin sick n holloweyed
hey man are you good?
(CH)
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11. |
||||
(my brain's all smooth inside)
haven't slept in 72 hours
took a nap & slept for 3
lyin awake inside the dark
whaddafawk is wrong w/ me
finally got a good 13
awake but still fatigued
I eat/ pass out/ my chin hits chest
same day but on nap 3
---
CH:
my circadians fukt
my circadians fukt
my biological clock
it knocks me out
& then gets stuck
--
Im rly tryna read
but the wall's too interesting
my brains blasted w/ fatigue
all my thoughts smeared with Clarice*
losing so much sleep
it's taking yrs off the enda my life
my brain's a viscous pile of slugs
but now it's sunlight fried
it feels all smooth inside
it feels all smooth inside
u could run yr fingers cross it
cuz it feels all smooth inside
touch fuzzy get dizzy
is what every waking hour's like
--
no sleep for 3 days
then 1 day sleep all day
sleep 4ever and a day
never sleep & never wake
I'll sleep & never wake
then I'll sleep for 3 more days
& 1 day I'll never wake
& I'll sleep 4ever & a day
--
CH:
my circadians fukt
my circadians fukt
my biological clock
goes tick tick tock
& then gets stuck
*(Lispector)
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12. |
issa bop
01:40
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gun ta ya nose
bloody ya clothes
headlight froze
gimme a dose
whaddo I want
gimme croissant
gimme ya doough
buy me some blonts
ima have not
gimme laptop
this is a bop
old man git bopped
we're the have nots
give or get got
this is a bop
old man get bopped
issa bop
issa bop
issa bop bop bop
issa lick
issa lick
issa lick lick lick
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13. |
chain drag trauma disco
04:29
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(TW:)
the last time I did acid
I fell into a trigger fractal
a dissociation spiral
rocking back & forth
I was back getting kicked in the mouth
& told not to talk
I was back getting kicked outta car
& told I could walk
wrestling a hand w/ a knife
hands around my throat
bleeding from my mouth
the last time that i dosed
---
feel like Im always on a precipice w/ u
hangin on a branch / or exposed root
dissolving cliff / root plz twist
twig slips / from my grip
but thats the cognitive dissonance
a trauma experiencer - who creates it
but cycles can slip & cycles can split
I want to believe another way exists
---
(I keep having)
Body Horror Dreams....
glass shards in bed blankets
begin pulling a thread out of one of my veins
& theres a sewingg needle at the end
In my dreams Im pulling out thin
glass, plastic, & metal
from my fingers
space station shrapnel
& draining giant blood blisters
in these Body Horror Dreams
---
I know intentions dont matter
as much as impact
Im skinless & trying to patch it up
w/ scraps of a burlap sack
Im rebuilding on scorched earth
Im way too undernourished
hurt ppl...hurt ppl...
& I dont wanna hurt
(the last time I did acid....
bleeding from my mouth...
twig slips / from my grip...
bleeding from my mouth....)
---
Ive barely existed for a year
now Ive gone from translucent to opaque
body still shimmering
but now I take up a place in time & space
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14. |
lepidopterae
01:14
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Ima cocoon
could eat me w/ a spoon
turned into puddin
it's what you put in
lepidopterae
lepidopterae
it's not my final form
im a lepidopterae
float in cocoon
mix it with a spoon
it's not my final form
the way i was born
Ima lepidopterae...
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15. |
"chunk it" / (the dillo)
02:40
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I gottaaaa
diiiie
I just hope
it's nice
----
accidentally hit a dillo
dragged um to side of the road
used my bass case as a gurney
& sat to w8 for him to go
laid him in the flowers
packed his wound up w/ dirt
a cop rolled up & crunched it
theyll always make a bad worse
--
I wn die in the flowers
I hope the sun is out
not confined not terrified
we all deserve that route
I hope we all can die
in a way comparatively nice
I hope we all will die
in a way that we like
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16. |
bedridden
01:44
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r u laying in bed?
cuz im laying in bed
i feel like im stuck here
i sunk here
im sludge here
the air is thick as seawater
my blood is thick as sand
my limbs are numb and tingaling
long leeches at the ends
im barely living slime
i spend most my time
bedridden
im barely living muck
i just cant get unstuck
bedridden
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17. |
sick woman theory
03:03
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Im always tired
me & my brain are broke
Im outta hope / end of my rope / no skills to cope
Im outta moves & outta spoons & outta fucks
I got the same amt of spoons as I got fucks
No spoons no fucks
no spoons no fucks
---
lustful trunk, lustful trunk
a cloud is shooting upward w/ a lustful trunk
a tree of heat's expanding w/ a lustful trunk
radiation dims my vision n all i envision in the junk
isa
fall out shelter
micron filter
isopod nasal rod
garbage eater
think i got anemia
roll can liner
gag bag gas rag trash bag climber
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18. |
||||
19. |
||||
CH:
called my friend up
but he da-ah-ah-ah-ah-ii-eed
called my friend up
but he da-ah-ah-ah-ii-ii-ied
i jus saw u
what the hell
we just talked
drinkin st.ides
we just were laffin
still got yr smell
call my friend up
but he died
(CH)
i done felt
a lotta loss
life is sufferin
itsa cost
hammrin onna wall
or hit sidewalk
or hit by car
cant answer phone call
(CH)
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20. |
||||
21. |
||||
we went to a few funerals together
went to a few shows and shot up together
always said "hello i hope yr day gets better"
but I can't envision a future cuz I got PTSD
& what I wanna know....
is....
will u come see me in the hospital?
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22. |
punky bad gurls club
01:31
|
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punky bad gurlz club takin o-over
punky bad gurls club takin uh-
punky bad gurlz club takin o-over
punky bad gurls club takin uh-
queer & trans bad gurlz club takin o-over
sick & ill bad gurls club takin uh-
black & brown bad gurlz club takin o-over
diabetic bad gurlz club takin uh--
|
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23. |
Blotchouts California
No Wave Punk project started in 2016 and variably based in California, Alabama, and Louisiana. Recordings are primarily Yanka Glowniss (she/her) on all instruments with occasional collaborators. Live lineups vary and rarely repeat. Yanka is also a member of Ginchy Gayjacket & the Flushable Wipes, ICBM, Two Crones, and Scrapies. Pre-2015 related music can be found at the Albacore Records bandcamp. ... more
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